Q: A child is capable of learning new things. So should we push him and give him more opportunities or just take it easy.

Dear Parent, Yes, a child is a natural learner and does have great capability to learn new things, but at his own pace. Therefore, let’s replace the word ‘push’ with ‘encourage’. Here are a few tips:Show genuine interest in your child’s interests as they emerge, have friendly chats about them.Be cautious about imposing your own ideas and interests upon your child.Give your child opportunities, just be careful not to overload his time. Let your child pick not more than two favorite classes to attend, perhaps twice or thrice a week.It’s important that he has time for free play at least on some days, where he decides how he would like to spend his time. Do allow him to daydream too!In early childhood, avoid competitions. Let children enjoy activities without the pressure of performance.Children like to explore different activities. This helps them get an idea of their interests. So invest only in the basic equipment they will need (avoid expensive kits and materials) because you don’t yet know how long the interest will last. Click on this link for more tips: How to Discover and Nurture Your Child's Hidden Talent

Q: Is it important to give educational and overall development stress to the younger generation?

Dear Parent, While education and overall development are very important aspects of a child’s growth, they should happen in ways that do not cause stress for the child or the parents. Children are natural learners - they enjoy learning new things in school, through activities and free play.Learning becomes stressful for your child when you:Expect your child to learn more than he is capable of at his ageUse punishment and threats to make him learn Do not realize that he is tired, sleepy, or hungryMake him sit for long hours to studyExpect him to give perfect answers and you do not tolerate mistakesScold him and make him afraidCompare him with other childrenHere’s how you can help your child enjoy learning:Understand her capacity according to her ageMake her study when she is rested and freshMake sure she is in a relaxed mood before she sits down to studyAllow her to learn as much as she can on her own and be there to help herGive her short practice sessions and limited work to doBe patient and fully involved when you teach herAccept that she will make mistakes; show her how to learn from themHave fun and make the learning enjoyableWhen a child and parent have a strong bond built on understanding, respect, encouragement, and support, the child becomes a confident and enthusiastic learner.

Q: What goes on in a 4-year kid's mind when she writes full A-Z like a mirror image?

Dear Parent, As a 4-year-old your child is probably in kindergarten. Writing is one of the most important skills she will learn for life, therefore you must take great care to make it an enjoyable experience for her. Patience and gentle encouragement work best. Scolding, punishment, and long hours of writing practice will take away the joy of learning and she will try hard to avoid written work. This can have long-term negative effects on her academic progress because she will have a lot of written work to do through her school years.Mirror writing is common among many children and usually disappears around classes 1 and 2. There is no harm in helping your child to write the alphabets correctly, provided you do the following:Let your daughter practice writing one alphabet at a time till she makes much fewer mistakes. Then move on to the next one.It is very important that you relax, stay calm, and be very patient with her.Make the learning experience light-hearted, fun, and relaxed. If you become tense, angry, and impatient, she will become afraid of you. Learning through fear is very unpleasant and scary for a child.If the mirror writing persists beyond 6-7 years of age, talk to her teacher and work together to help your child. Many parents believe that mirror writing is always a symptom of dyslexia, but that’s not true. Sometimes it’s a visual-spatial difficulty where a child has difficulty with the form and spacing of the alphabets. If the mirror writing persists even after her teacher and you have tried to help, you can have your child do an academic assessment with a qualified special educator. Before you take this step do consider getting your child’s eyes tested to rule out any vision problems.

Q: My child is a very good student and active in extracurricular activities. Lately, he has been stressing a lot about exams. We do not pressurize him. Why is he so stressed?

Dear Parent, It must be so hard for you to see your child so stressed out. It’s possible that he is putting a lot of pressure on himself. Some of the pressure could also come from the class if there is raw competition and from self-expectations to ace the exams. Although done in good faith, when you explain things to him, you express your viewpoint and expect him to feel reassured. Since your approach is not working, let's try a different one.You will understand the cause of his stress only when he shares it with you. To enable this sharing, calm yourself – do things that relieve your own stress because your child will otherwise pick up your stress too. You could say to him, “I know how scary the exams are. It must be making you feel tense and worried. Would you like to talk about it?” Your words will convey empathy and caring for what he is feeling deep inside him and will help him open up and share his fears and worries. At this point just be a good listener. Do not counter what he says. He needs to feel safe – that you will not criticize or offer advice. The outpouring helps settle his fears and worries. Ask him, “How would you like us to help you?” He is now ready to find solutions with your guidance and support. Hope this is helpfulFor additional tips, please click on the following links:Exam Tension: Tips From Child PsychologistTips To De-stress Your Child During Exams

Question 1

A child is capable of learning new things. So should we push him and give him more opportunities or just take it easy.

Accepted Answer

&#xA0;Dear Parent,&#xA0;Yes, a child is a natural learner and does have great capability to learn new things, but at his own pace. Therefore, let&#x2019;s replace the word &#x2018;push&#x2019; with &#x2018;encourage&#x2019;. &#xA0;Here are a few tips:Show genuine interest in your child&#x2019;s interests as they emerge, have friendly chats about them.Be cautious about imposing your own ideas and interests upon your child.Give your child opportunities, just be careful not to overload his time. Let your child pick not more than two favorite classes to attend, perhaps twice or thrice a week.It&#x2019;s important that he has time for free play at least on some days, where he decides how he would like to spend his time. Do allow him to daydream too!In early childhood, avoid competitions. Let children enjoy activities without the pressure of performance.Children like to explore different activities. This helps them get an idea of their interests. So invest only in the basic equipment they will need (avoid expensive kits and materials) because you don&#x2019;t yet know how long the interest will last.&#xA0; &#xA0; &#xA0; Click on this link for more tips:&#xA0; &#xA0;How to Discover and Nurture Your Child&#x27;s Hidden Talent&#xA0; &#xA0; &#xA0; &#xA0; &#xA0;

Question 2

Is it important to give educational and overall development stress to the younger generation?

Accepted Answer

Dear Parent,&#xA0;While education and overall development are very important aspects of a child&#x2019;s growth, they should happen in ways that do not cause stress for the child or the parents. Children are natural learners - they enjoy learning new things in school, through activities and free play.Learning becomes stressful for your child when you:Expect your child to learn more than he is capable of at his ageUse punishment and threats to make him learn&#xA0;Do not realize that he is tired, sleepy, or hungryMake him sit for long hours to studyExpect him to give perfect answers and you do not tolerate mistakesScold him and make him afraidCompare him with other childrenHere&#x2019;s how you can help your child enjoy learning:Understand her capacity according to her ageMake her study when she is rested and freshMake sure she is in a relaxed mood before she sits down to studyAllow her to learn as much as she can on her own and be there to help herGive her short practice sessions and limited work to doBe patient and fully involved when you teach herAccept that she will make mistakes; show her how to learn from themHave fun and make the learning enjoyableWhen a child and parent have a strong bond built on understanding, respect, encouragement, and support, the child becomes a confident and enthusiastic learner.

Question 3

What goes on in a 4-year kid&#x27;s mind when she writes full A-Z like a mirror image?

Accepted Answer

Dear Parent,&#xA0;As a 4-year-old your child is probably in kindergarten. Writing is one of the most important skills she will learn for life, therefore you must take great care to make it an enjoyable experience for her. Patience and gentle encouragement work best. Scolding, punishment, and long hours of writing practice will take away the joy of learning and she will try hard to avoid written work. This can have long-term negative effects on her academic progress because she will have a lot of written work to do through her school years.Mirror writing is common among many children and usually disappears around classes 1 and 2. There is no harm in helping your child to write the alphabets correctly, provided you do the following:Let your daughter practice writing one alphabet at a time till she makes much fewer mistakes. Then move on to the next one.It is very important that you relax, stay calm, and be very patient with her.Make the learning experience light-hearted, fun, and relaxed. If you become tense, angry, and impatient, she will become afraid of you. Learning through fear is very unpleasant and scary for a child.If the mirror writing persists beyond 6-7 years of age, talk to her teacher and work together to help your child. Many parents believe that mirror writing is always a symptom of dyslexia, but that&#x2019;s not true. Sometimes it&#x2019;s a visual-spatial difficulty where a child has difficulty with the form and spacing of the alphabets. If the mirror writing persists even after her teacher and you have tried to help, you can have your child do an academic assessment with a qualified special educator. Before you take this step do consider getting your child&#x2019;s eyes tested to rule out any vision problems.&#xA0;

Question 4

My child is a very good student and active in extracurricular activities. Lately, he has been stressing a lot about exams. We do not pressurize him. Why is he so stressed?

Accepted Answer

Dear Parent,&#xA0;It must be so hard for you to see your child so stressed out. It&#x2019;s possible that he is putting a lot of pressure on himself. Some of the pressure could also come from the class if there is raw competition and from self-expectations to ace the exams. Although done in good faith, when you explain things to him, you express your viewpoint and expect him to feel reassured. Since your approach is not working, let&#x27;s try a different one.You will understand the cause of his stress only when he shares it with you. To enable this sharing, calm yourself &#x2013; do things that relieve your own stress because your child will otherwise pick up your stress too. You could say to him, &#x201C;I know how scary the exams are. It must be making you feel tense and worried. Would you like to talk about it?&#x201D; Your words will convey empathy and caring for what he is feeling deep inside him and will help him open up and share his fears and worries. At this point just be a good listener. Do not counter what he says. He needs to feel safe &#x2013; that you will not criticize or offer advice. The outpouring helps settle his fears and worries. Ask him, &#x201C;How would you like us to help you?&#x201D; He is now ready to find solutions with your guidance and support. Hope this is helpfulFor additional tips, please click on the following links:Exam Tension: Tips From Child PsychologistTips To De-stress Your Child During Exams

Question 5

I would like to know how best I can help my child in pursuing his passion. I can see most of his time just going on in doing school work. He is stressed and unhappy most of the time. He likes to play badminton and the guitar, but he hardly gets time to do

Accepted Answer

Dear Parent,&#xA0;Kudos to you for giving your child the space and freedom to pursue his passions, instead of only pressuring him to study. Not many parents are able to find that balance when it comes to their children (esp. when the child is in a board exam year!) Hobbies and passions are extremely important to pursue, no matter what stage of life since they aid in personal growth and help us develop new skills. You could help your son balance his academics and hobbies in the following ways:Help him draw a home timetable (with time slots for meals and rest) with his most productive time accounted for. For example, if he is most productive in the evenings, he should schedule his schoolwork then. Accordingly, he could utilize 1 hour every week in the afternoon (maybe after coming back from school, when he needs to unwind) for playing his guitar.It is important to schedule physical activity and exercise in this timetable but the timing is important. Would it be feasible to build in 1 hour of playing on a weekend and 1 hour on a weekday when the homework is comparatively less? If he plays badminton regularly, he will realize that he is able to concentrate on schoolwork much better, which in turn saves time.&#xA0;Help him fight off procrastination. If studying for a test or revising a chapter needs to be done, help him understand how procrastinating would make it even more difficult to do later. If he revises a chapter when it&#x2019;s still fresh in his memory, it will consume much less time, and practicing this will help him in the long run.&#xA0;Build in a rest day. Everyone needs rest to rejuvenate themselves and to keep themselves motivated. Encourage your son to build in a rest day (it could be a weekday or a weekend) which will help build the strength to handle the pressure of the remaining week.&#xA0;Check time-robbers. Checking our mobile phones for app notifications consumes more time than we realize. It is much smarter to even schedule social media/e-connecting with friends time in your home timetable, or to engage in these distractions in breaks so that this time is accounted for and doesn&#x27;t end up being wasted. One way of doing this is to simply keep one&#x27;s mobile switched off or in another room while studying. Another is to catch up with messages and notifications while commuting.&#xA0;&#xA0;Focus on his body. A healthy diet and at least 7-8 hours of quality sleep are very important (and often this is overlooked by adolescents).&#xA0;Keep the connection with your child going. Allow him to believe that he has scope to make mistakes. Praise him for his effort, rather than for the outcome--it will keep him motivated. &#xA0;

Learning FAQs

Learning

A child is capable of learning new things. So should we push him and give him more opportunities or just take it easy.

Learning

Is it important to give educational and overall development stress to the younger generation?

Learning

What goes on in a 4-year kid's mind when she writes full A-Z like a mirror image?

Learning

My child is a very good student and active in extracurricular activities. Lately, he has been stressing a lot about exams. We do not pressurize him. Why is he so stressed?

Learning

I would like to know how best I can help my child in pursuing his passion. I can see most of his time just going on in doing school work. He is stressed and unhappy most of the time. He likes to play badminton and the guitar, but he hardly gets time to do

Learning

Our daughter changes her career decisions often after discussing with her friends. We are fine with her decisions, but worried with what her choice will be. She is in her 12th Std now

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What is the attention span of a kindergartener?

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My sister's teen daughter wants to pursue classical music full-time. Parents feel that she should also get an academic degree. We do not want to crush her dreams too

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I want to homeschool my 10-year-old. Please help me

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How do you teach kids without giving them punishments?

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How can I help my child improve his knowledge of languages (especially spelling) and his memory?

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My son does not like to write and refuses to do the homework. Should I force him to write the homework?

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My daughter is 14 years old and very good at academics. However, despite working hard to improve her Math, she is not getting good results. How can I help my child?

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Please help me to understand the importance of studies in life

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How to make children enjoy studies?