That Night, Something Changed In Me

Are you having daily conversations with your child about the experiences he had that day? If not, better start it today. This emotionally stirring experience of Ashok tells you why

It was a busy afternoon at work. I came back to my desk after lunch. Just as I was about to switch on my laptop, my wife called me on my mobile. I straightened my chair and picked up my phone. Please come to the hospital immediately. Im so scared. Our son has suddenly fainted in our living room, she shrieked in between sobs. I froze in my chair for a second. My son is eight, and he waved a happy goodbye as I left to work this morning. What could have happened in such a short span? As my mind raced to think about all the possibilities, I quickly informed my manager and left immediately. The 30-minute ride to the hospital was the most agonising one Ive ever had in my life.

I saw my wife weeping at the hospital reception, with my son lying down weakly on her lap. Seeing him lying there, in front of me, reminded me to breathe again. I gave him a hug and swallowed hard, holding back my tears. The doctor wants us to take a MRI, cried my wife. We took the scan and waited for the results impatiently for a few hours.

As we were waiting, I asked my wife what happened. My wife, still whimpering, explained how our son had walked out of the bed into the living room and said, Amma take me in an auto to the hospital. I cannot walk, and collapsed. The scene kept playing back in my head and I was unable to digest my eight-year-old saying that. These were not the words of my child. This was a mature sentence. He must have gone through so much discomfort!

My wife then added that our son had apparently hit his head while playing with his friends a couple of days ago. He hid it from her out of fear.

I remembered how he has been complaining of a headache for the past two days. We thought he was faking a headache since we asked him to study for his ongoing exams. I hit myself in the head for not trusting my son and not making time to talk to him about his day this whole week.

I usually drop off my children at school and then head to work. On our way to the school, my children tell me stories, and I tell them what happened at work. I make funny noises to make them laugh. They crack up and it makes my day. They share a lot about whats going on at school and home during this ride. My children find it easier to reach out to me, since my wife is hard on them. It is probably because she deals with them through the day and takes care of them. The time I spend with them, compared to her, is little. So, I always ensure I make the most of it. But this week, they had exams in the afternoon. So, I did not drop them off to school. By the time I got back home after my 25km ride from work, they were either too busy studying, or were already asleep. If only we had those rides, my son would have told me about the incident. I would have known his headache was not a fake complaint to escape studying.

I felt extremely guilty for not making time for him. The unsettling evening somehow passed by, and we got the results. Thankfully, nothing was wrong. The doctor prescribed some medicine and advised him to rest up. I thanked him profoundly.

That night, something changed in me. And I shared my thoughts with my wife, who agreed with me. It will not be my childrens marks or their performance at school that will matter hereafter. It is them. Their childhood matters. They shouldnt be afraid to play with us or tell us whatever happens to them. In fact, we should be the first people they think about when something is not right.

I also made a note in my mind nothing should stop me from asking my children, Lets talk about today, every day.