Why is my teen going through so many changes? How can I support my teen? How do I stay calm within myself? Ask all your questions and get answers from fellow parents and experts! ... more
Suggested Discussion
Join a community to interact with like-minded parents and share your thoughts on parenting and more
Don't miss! Tune in to the most talked about views and contributions.
Hot topics people are discussing right now ... dive in and share your thoughts!
A compilation of the most-read, liked and commented stories on parenting, learning, wellness and lifestyle
3 Mins Read • 14.7K Views
11 Mins Read • 17.4K Views
14 Mins Read • 4.5K Views
7 Mins Read • 94.2K Views
2 Mins Read • 10.6K Views
4 Mins Read • 74.5K Views
We use cookies to allow us to better understand how the site is used. By continuing to use this site, you consent to this policy. Click to learn more
Comments
Team ParentCircle Mar 28, 2019
Team ParentCircle Mar 28, 2019
@Team ParentCircle
Did they bully or intimidate him to buy it ? try to find out more about what really happened and what is going on.
Unfortunately this group of kids seems to be heading for trouble and the sad news is that theses bullies will have supporters, who will listen to them and respect them out of fear or whatever reason, and your child will never be able to please all of them.
Please tell him that it is ok to be different from them. There is no need to buy or use anything just to please this group of kids or belong in that group. He can find better friends and he doesn't need these kind of people in his life.
Also educate him about the harmful effects of smoking and tell him that smoking is something that you don't believe in or do. He should take decisions that are good for him, his family, and everybody in general.
Highlight his strong points and good behavior and tell him that he has made you proud several times and you hope he continues that all his life. Good Luck.
Team ParentCircle Mar 28, 2019
@Team ParentCircle
I can imagine how worried you must be about this. There are a few issues here: 1) is your teen smoking-in which case is it due to peer pressure? and 2) is he telling the truth- was he indeed forced to buy the cigarettes, which means he lacks assertiveness or is he telling lies to cover up his own smoking? The best way to find out whats really going on is to have regular ongoing conversations with your son. Be cued into his life, talk to him daily (not just asking him questions but also sharing about your own day), and ensure that when he does share something (even if you dont approve of it) resist the urge to scold or lecture him. Adolescents are only put off and pushed away by adults who are judgmental. You could also invite your sons friends home and have friendly conversations to get to know them better.
This isnt to say that you should encourage the activities you know are harmful or undesirable. You can and should pass on your own values to him in a way that doesnt sound preachy. Specifically, with regard to smoking, its possible that your son does lack assertiveness skills to be able to say no to his friends (whether to actually smoke himself or to buy the cigarettes). In this case, you should teach him how he can stand up for himself, despite pressure from his friends. Use everyday moments to talk about friendships and what they entail. For example, friendships should be characterized by mutual respect and not coercion. Talk about how its not okay to force someone to do things they are not comfortable with, no matter how much fun it may seem to you. Also, play the What if? game. Discuss with your son some possible peer pressure situations. Ask him what he would do in such situations. This will equip your son with tools he can use if an actual situation arises without having to think his feet about what to do.
Team ParentCircle Mar 1, 2019
How To Deal With Teenage Behaviour Issues
Team ParentCircle Jan 3, 2019
Team ParentCircle Jan 3, 2019
@Team ParentCircle
Team ParentCircle Dec 17, 2018
Read here >>> https://www.parentcircle.com/article/7-ways-to-manage-backtoschool-anxiety/
Team ParentCircle Dec 17, 2018
@Team ParentCircle
Team ParentCircle Dec 7, 2018
Read here https://www.parentcircle.com/article/how-to-get-your-child-to-listen-to-you/
Team ParentCircle Dec 7, 2018
@Team ParentCircle
Team ParentCircle Dec 3, 2018
Read more here >>> https://www.parentcircle.com/article/7-conversations-you-must-have-with-your-teen-and-when/
Team ParentCircle Dec 3, 2018
@Team ParentCircle
PC Admin Nov 7, 2018
PC Admin Nov 12, 2018
@PC Admin
PC Admin Nov 13, 2018
@PC Admin
PC Admin Nov 14, 2018
@PC Admin
See All Reply
PC Admin Oct 31, 2018
PC Admin Nov 13, 2018
@PC Admin
Sometimes the answers lead to more questions. Yet, we follow what our elders did because we believe and trust them and participate in the celebration.
Make sure you involve your daughter in prayers, poojas, visits to religious places like temples, churches, discourses etc., There are plenty of books that she can read about religion and spiritual topics but for a start, reading comics about mythological stories and about great saints /people is a great way to slowly change her outlook.
Also,involve other elders in the family whom she likes, to answer her doubts and questions. Hope this helps.
mahalakshmi adhavan Oct 29, 2018
mahalakshmi adhavan Oct 29, 2018
@mahalakshmi adhavan
PEP Community Manager Jul 13, 2018
PEP Community Manager Aug 3, 2018
@PEP Community Manager
Show all 10 comments
Edit
Comment Flag
Cancel Update