How To Keep Your Child Safe From Substance Abuse And Sexual Harm

Teenage years are the time when children set off on a journey of self-discovery. It is also the phase when they experiment, explore, and test the boundaries - all of which play an important role in shaping their personality and identity. But it is also a period of confusion, doubts, and uncertainty, when some teens indulge in unsafe behavior like substance abuse or risky sexual practices.

The Ministry of Health and Family Welfare surveyed teens from 2015 to 2016 and found that 18.5% of 15 to 19-year-old boys used tobacco while only 1.6% of girls in that age group did so. It also found that 0.5% of girls and 8.9% of boys, in the 15-19 age group, consumed alcohol as well. Mehta et al published a study entitled, 'Adolescent Reproductive and Sexual Health in India: The Need to Focus', in the Journal of Young Medical Researchers (2013). The study notes that "there are 49,000 adolescent males and 46,000 adolescent females with HIV positive in India."

These facts may be alarming, but remember that an open conversation with your child can guide them toward safer decisions and responsible behavior.

Why you should talk to your teen about risky sexual behavior

There are several reasons why teens resort to risky sexual behavior. The urge to show off, take risks, curiosity about sex, and hormonal changes make teens especially vulnerable. They may even get trapped in sexually compromising situations. Therefore, you must talk to your teen about sex as well as the dangers of unsafe sexual encounters.

Here are a few points to consider:

How to talk to your teen

• Do it at the earliest: Don't delay talking to your teen due to hesitation or until you find that they have been indulging in risky sexual activity.
• Break down the lesson: Most parents make the mistake of giving long lectures or exaggerating the 'talk'. This can make your teen feel disinterested, overwhelmed or uncomfortable. The best thing to do is to look for opportunities in everyday conversations to casually introduce the topic.
• Talk about consent: Help your teen understand that consent is an important part of sex. They have the right to say 'No' and pull themselves out of a sexually risky situation—even if they had said 'Yes' before or are being pressured into it. Similarly, they should also respect their partner's right to say 'No'.
• The dangers of cybersex: With most teens hooked to the Internet, it is important to talk to your child about the dangers of risky online sexual encounters. Ensure your child turns on the safety features of their browser. Also, ask them to cover the laptop webcam with a sticker to prevent hackers from spying. Inform them about the dangers of accessing porn, frequenting dating sites, and the legal implications of online sex.
• Teach safety techniques: Tell your teen that not just strangers but even those that they know well, can sexually assault them. Help your teen identify the danger signs to watch—luring them to a deserted place, compelling them to consume drugs/alcohol, and not respecting their consent or right to privacy. Talk about the different ways they can immediately get out of such a situation and how to seek help.

Why you should talk to your teen about psychoactive substance abuse

Some teens are prone to using psychoactive substances, which can affect brain function and cause changes in mood and behavior. They use these substances because of an urge to experiment, feel good, or fit into a group. Or it could be due to peer pressure, the need for instant gratification, easily influenced by the media, or even as an escape from stress. While most teens indulge in substance abuse out of curiosity and stop after a few attempts, some get addicted right from the first use.

Therefore, you must talk to your teen about the dangers of substance abuse. Here are a few tips:

• Choose your moments: Make sure that you choose the right moment to initiate the conversation. For example, when you and your child are watching TV together and there is an advertisement about the dangers of smoking. Or if your child is talking about someone in their circle who is addicted to substances, use the opportunity well. Try to find such moments in everyday interactions.
• Understand your child's thoughts: Your teen likely knows a few things about psychoactive substances. When you initiate a conversation, they may be willing to share concerns and ask specific questions. Use these to better understand your child's thoughts and feelings.
• Stay calm: An important topic like the abuse of psychoactive substances merits a serious and open discussion. So, gather information and prepare yourself. Do not lecture or overreact when talking with your child.
• Talk about the dangers and consequences: Apprise your child of the dangers of using psychoactive substances. For example, smoking causes cancer and heart disease, alcohol harms the liver, and drugs affect the brain. Let your teen know they can get into trouble with the law if found using substances. They could be fined or even face imprisonment.

It is always a good idea to initiate these conversations as early as possible. And along with talking to your child about substance abuse or risky sexual practices, you should also model the responsible behaviors and values that you want your child to follow.