Breaking Toy Gender Stereotypes: How Parents Can Support Children’s Natural Play

When Sushma and her two children visited the new toy store in their neighbourhood, they were impressed by the wide variety of books and playthings on display. Her eight-year-old daughter let out a squeal of delight when she saw row after row of toys to play with, while her five-year-old son busied himself with a farm set.

The sections were clearly marked with bright signs saying 'For Boys' and 'For Girls.' The little girl browsed for some time, then picked up a STEM toy and ran to her mother with much excitement. A little annoyed with her choice, Sushma snapped, "Are you even going to play with that? It will be difficult for girls to understand those instructions."

How toy stereotypes begin early in childhood

Do you think that is the correct approach? Was Sushma right in thinking that her daughter could not play with a tech toy? Definitely not. She just reiterated a bias that has been around for a long time, that boys excel at the scientific stuff while girls are good at verbal skills. This stereotype is carried forward in adulthood, as men are presumed to play the tough roles, while women are categorised as being good at roles that involve empathy.

How stereotypes shape skills and self-belief

Have you thought twice about picking up a truck or action figure for your son, or the cooking set or jewellery kit for your daughter?

What parents often overlook while choosing toys

Parents subconsciously get conditioned to choose gender-specific play material for their children because of the preconceived notions that they may have about how kids should grow up and how they should play. Toy manufacturing companies and stores bolster the stereotype by promoting gender-specific toys.

"I am very conscious of the gender stereotyping that happens in toy stores and feel that it restricts children's play. I make it a point to buy gender-neutral toys for my daughter Maya. I get her toys like superheroes and bikes," says Sindhu S, mother of a two-year-old.

Why gender-neutral toys support creativity and learning

Toys that are not too structured and promote open-ended play are best for boys and girls. Gender-neutral toys allow them to be creative while exploring different ideas, without being constricted by a particular kind of play. Parents should also avoid buying toys targeted at girls, which promote certain impossible standards of beauty and looks, which might make young girls feel inadequate about themselves.

In the 'Let Toys Be Toys' campaign led by Mumsnet, a group of parents works to influence toy retailers to stop gender labelling of toys and to promote gender neutral toys for children. The campaign emphasises that kids should decide for themselves what they think is fun and that children need a wide range of play to develop different skills.

What research and experts say about toy choices

According to a 2016 study conducted by sociologist Elizabeth Sweet at Sacramento State University, children must be exposed to all kinds of toys to aid in their development. She explains that not allowing children to play with different toys severely limits their ability to develop a wide range of skills. This is also the reason why men continue to dominate in areas of science and technology, while women take more nurturing roles. The sociologist reiterates that all toys have their advantages, and children must be allowed to choose according to their interests. Building blocks help develop spatial skills while dolls teach language skills.  So children can engage with all of these.

"Children develop and explore their imagination, creativity, emotions, and rules set by parents through play. Toys are one of the important forms of play, where children can easily pick up and learn skills beneficial for their future. From a very young age (as early as 2 years), building blocks, musical instruments, squeeze toys, puzzles, etc., help children develop spatial (visual learning), cognitive (logical learning), and kinesthetic skills (physical learning). Children pick up social cues from their surroundings. By gender stereotyping a child's toy, we unintentionally exploit and manipulate a child's social skills and development," says Geetapriya Manoharan, counselling psychologist.

Unlike an adult's brain, a young child's brain continues to grow and change. This phenomenon is called neuroplasticity. As a result, your child's mind is highly impressionable. What your child learns now has a lasting effect on how they form their ideologies, cognitive abilities, and social skills, she adds.

Research indicates that the marketing of gender-specific toys is a recent trend.  Despite gender bias being prevalent in daily life in the 1970s and 1980s, kids' toys were more neutral then, and it is only towards the early 1990s that these types of gender stereotypes became more pronounced.

Why gender-neutral toys support creativity and learning

Geetapriya gives important points on avoiding gender stereotyping:

• When left to their own devices, children play with whatever they want and however they want to. Leave children alone with just a blanket, a few tumblers, and a spoon, and watch them turn it into something incredible.
• As parents, we want to do our best for our children. But, when we place a restriction on the child, based on what society will say, the child plays with a toy that is not gender appropriate. You take away their imagination, creativity, and their natural curiosity to learn things. This may also affect their self-esteem.
• When selecting toys for children, check if they are age-appropriate and of interest to their child. Selecting age-specific toys instead of gender specific toys will help children form healthy ideologies and identities.
• Each child is different, and each child plays differently. If a boy child is quiet and likes playing with cooking sets, let him. It may help to bring out his nurturing side and explore his emotions through role play. Restricting him will make him upset. Along with other influences such as parents/authority figures, video games, and media, this will also reaffirm that only certain types of toys are for boys. And, from early on, he may develop a biased attitude towards girls and boys.

Tips for parents to avoid gender-stereotyping of toys

1. Give your child access to a range of toys without giving gender-specific inputs.

2. Let your child explore what he wants to play with, without being influenced by any bias.

3. Avoid giving a harsh or negative reaction when your boy picks a supposedly feminine toy and vice versa.

4. Encourage your little one's choice regardless of what toy she is interested in. It will boost her confidence.

5. Avoid buying toys that promote impossible standards of beauty for girls and those that promote violence, particularly targeted at boys.

Play is important, no matter the toy. Embrace inclusiveness in all aspects and teach your child to do the same. In the end, not only must the child enjoy playtime, but also be able to enjoy different types of toys without the pressure of societal gender norms.  After all, children learn through play, and what better medium than through toys.

Checklist for choosing toys without gender bias

• Choose toys based on age and interest, not gender labels

• Offer a mix of toys—construction, pretend play, art, music

• Avoid reacting negatively to your child’s toy choice

• Skip toys that promote violence or unrealistic beauty standards

• Let play be about joy, exploration, and learning, not stereotypes

Last updated on December 30, 2025