12 Vital Job Skills You Have Honed As A Mom

Getting back to work after taking a career break to raise a child can certainly be challenging. For one thing, you’re now responsible for another human being in so many different ways. As you attempt to make it back to the workforce, it’s only natural for you to be concerned about the gaps in your résumé, particularly the skills you think you’re lacking. Suddenly, you feel you’re no longer such an attractive prospect in the job market.

But what you may have ignored in all this confidence-bashing introspection is that you have acquired several skills in your already exciting mommy journey. Trust me, many employers today value this versatile basket of skills, along with the maturity that parenting invariably brings.

In fact, mom skills can be transferred to the workplace! In addition to listing your innate (unique to your personality) skills, academic achievements, and other job-related skills, touching upon these “mom skills” will make you stand out as a candidate who has utilized her break fruitfully.

According to a 2012 survey conducted by the US-based Korn Ferry Institute, 95% of female professionals reported that raising children has given them transferable job skills. The top transferable skills, according to the respondents, including motivating and inspiring others, learning agility (applying past experience in new ways), and confidence. The study concluded that being a mom offered training in psychology, time management, and diplomacy that could easily be applied in the workplace.

Let’s dig deeper and look at a few “mom skills” that would be very useful in the workplace:

1. Multitasking: Although there’s a growing debate on its pros and cons, multitasking remains one of the foremost skills moms acquire. And why not? Ask a mom who is supervising her elementary schooler’s homework while making sure that what’s on the stove does not get burned, while fixing an appointment with her toddler’s pediatrician! Yes, it’s possible only with mommies. American comedian Milton Berle famously asked: “If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?”

Tied to multitask are efficient time management skills (as there’s so much to do) and the ability to meet deadlines. For instance, getting their children ready for school is hard deadline mothers need to meet every day.

2. Effective communication: Dealing with a young person requires a talent for “active listening” and sound communication skills. Active listening means concentrating fully, responding with understanding, and remembering what has been said. It helps a parent gauge the feelings behind the words being said by the child. According to management guru Peter Drucker, “The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn’t said.”

Again, there’s a need to communicate with clarity when talking to a child so that she understands fully what’s being said. This applies to both giving instructions in a note and giving verbal advice. Good communication skills (both spoken and written) are much sought after by employers.

3. Planning and prioritizing: Imagine the attention to detail required to plan the birthday party of a preschooler! There are invitations to be sent out, the party dress for the birthday child and trendy return gifts for the guests to be bought, the cake to be baked or procured, the food and drink menu to be finalized, and the decorations to be set up. And, of course, party games have to be organized so that everyone has fun. Planning a child’s birthday party is a test of organizational ability and event-planning skills. This is where planning and prioritizing become critical. Mommies are masters at deciding which activities are “musts” and which they can let go of.

4. Problem-solving: This is another essential skill for a mom. For instance, if your child is facing academic problems at school, you have to think through how this problem can be best tackled. From evaluating the extent of the problem and analyzing the causes to finding a solution and seeing whether it works, a mommy has to go through all these steps in consultation with her child and his teachers.

5. Dealing with uncertainty: The ability to deal with unexpected events and keep one’s calm in a crisis are invaluable job skills that moms develop sooner rather than later. In fact, having to deal with uncertainty is a certainty for mothers! For example, you may have planned a party at home when suddenly your young one gets a high fever. Change of plans—you rush to the pediatrician trying to keep your anxiety in check. Similarly, when you’re traveling with children, you may face unexpected challenges. Your toddler may develop a food allergy. Being used to dealing with the unexpected, moms may have become decisive and learned how to handle stressful situations effectively.

6. Negotiation and conflict resolution: Toddlers and teens have one thing in common—it’s difficult to persuade them to do something! Consider this situation. You’re dog-tired at the end of the day but your 5-year-old is still bright and chirpy. You need to negotiate with your child exactly how many books you’ll read to her or how many stories you’ll tell her at bedtime. Another example is negotiating with your teen about how much screen time is acceptable each day. After discussing all points of view and setting rules, you have to ensure the rules are implemented.

Moms are frequently required to intervene in a conflict between siblings. Media personality David Frost once said: “Having one child makes you a parent. Having two kids makes you a referee.” As a mother, you have to patiently listen to both sides to understand the situation before presenting an “acceptable” solution so that neither party thinks you are favoring the other. That’s a super skill for sure.

7. Ability to influence others: The ability to influence our children is the cornerstone of parenting. A mother is able to influence her child by modeling the kind of behavior she wants her child to follow, and by forming a close connection so that her child listens to her when she gives advice. Similarly, by setting a good example and becoming skillful at persuading and mentoring team members, an employee can exert considerable influence in the workplace.

8. Motivating others: Encouragement works wonders, more so in parenting. Not only does encouragement build a child’s self-esteem, but it also makes him try even harder the next time around. Moms have mastered the art of motivating others. A mother knows the power of praise and encouragement to motivate her child to improve his performance, be it in academics, sports, or any other activity. Knowing how to successfully motivate your team is a key leadership skill.

9. Teaching and supervising: From infancy, a mother guides her child as she learns to sit up, walk, and later, say a few words. From teaching a toddler to button up her jacket to helping a teen master the art of baking, teaching and supervising come naturally to a mother. Teaching a skill, mentoring, and supervising are all activities of central importance at the workplace. Employees in a supervisory role have to learn how to handle coworkers, which is not very different from handling children.

10. Patience, reliability, and dedication: Parenting and patience go together. Says Nancy Cruickshank CEO of myshowcase.com, in an article written for the UK-based newspaper The Telegraph: “I had no better training for enhancing my patience than in parenting. Potty training, teaching your child to dress herself, negotiating with your teen—all of these things require patience in abundance.”

As a parent, being reliable is vital. If you have told your child that you’ll be back from an errand in an hour to take him to the park, you need to keep your word. As for dedication, what task requires more dedication than taking care of a child day in and day out for at least 18 years?

11. Confidence and positive attitude: No parent is prepared for the enormity of the task of taking care of a child. Yet one blunder along with the help of elders or the insights of peer-parenting and emerges reasonably competent. The very process of parenting gives a person immense confidence. You think: “If I can raise a child, I can do anything.” This positivity would make a mom a welcome addition to the workforce.

12. A sense of humor: There are several occasions when humor can be used to diffuse a situation and reach a compromise. Humor is also an invaluable stressbuster that can keep you afloat both as a parent and in dealing with a sticky situation at work or a difficult boss.

Expert take

To understand the value parenting skills can bring to the workplace, we spoke to Dr Manjari Singh, a professor in human resources management at IIM, Ahmedabad. She is a mother of a teen. This is what she had to say:

Q1. What are the three main skills a woman picks up being a mom that are useful in the workplace?

A. I would mention the three main skills from my perspective. First, the ability to multitask. I was not very good at this prior to becoming a mother. We have three main roles as academics—teaching, research and administrative work. Earlier, I would compartmentalize these. Now I’m comfortable doing them in tandem. Multitasking requires a great deal of planning and prioritizing.

Second, the ability to understand things that are not articulated. This definitely improves while raising a child, as children are sometimes not able to articulate their wishes or feelings very well. So, one learns to pick up the signals people give and develop more empathy toward others. In the same context, you learn to give clear instructions, as you’re used to doing this with your child.

Third, the ability to deal with uncertainty. Our job is very structured. But raising a child makes us realize that everything cannot be planned. Parenting equips us to respond quickly with ad hoc solutions. I must emphasize that I did not develop these skills overnight—I learned them during each stage of my child’s development.

Q2. How can moms who are returning to work after a gap of a few years make their résumé or interview impressive by highlighting the “mom skills turned job skills”?

A. This depends on two factors—the organization and the job. Some companies recognize the potential that returning moms have more than other companies do. They realize that supporting mechanisms for a young mother are much better today. The company could be facing a talent gap and be looking for good people, or they could be consciously wanting to promote a second career. However, it’s not a universal thing.

Whether mom skills can compensate for the skill gap returning moms face depends on the job. This is where the difference between a managerial job and a knowledge-based job comes into play. If the job is all about managing people, mom skills could be very useful. For instance, in a teacher’s job, mom skills and the maturity and patience women develop after becoming mothers are very valuable. This is also the case where managing clients or employees is the key role.

However, in a high-skilled, technology-related job, this would not be so. In a knowledge-based job, a woman would have to not just get back in touch with earlier skills but also update skills to suit the present job market. If she’s able to bridge the knowledge gap, then talking about the additional mom skills would definitely help.

Mom Speak

I was applying for a research job in Australia. Among the selection criteria was one that stated that I should have demonstrated effective interpersonal negotiation, consultative and communication skills. I responded that my professional and personal role as a psychotherapist, lecturer, researcher, trainer, and mother had helped me develop these very skills. I explained how being a mother involved communicating clearly, bargaining, setting boundaries, and emotional regulation. At the interview, they pointed out that they liked the fact that instead of hiding my role as a mother, I was highlighting it. I added that being a mom had strengthened my skills in certain areas that would be useful professionally. They did not question me about the gaps in my CV.

– Dr Meghna Singhal, working mother of two young children

Women have a large set of skills—some innate, some acquired during the course of parenting. Mom skills can go a long way in helping women in the workplace. In addition, moms are quick, hands-on learners, learning new things almost every day. This willingness to learn is one of the greatest assets that employers are looking for.

In a nutshell

• Women who are returning to the workforce after taking a break to raise children need not feel inadequate.
• While certain jobs may require them to upgrade their skills, they need to be aware of the new skills they have acquired while parenting.
• Some of these mom skills are multitasking, dealing with uncertainty, planning and prioritizing, and communicating effectively.

What you can do right away

• At the next job interview, refrain from being apologetic about having taken a break. Instead, highlight how being a mother has enhanced your skillset.
• Take pride in your role as a mother—it’s one of the most difficult jobs on the planet!