Behaviour in 2 - 5 year oldsAre you a parent of a pre-schooler, who is concerned about your little one's behaviour? Join our discussion to clear your doubts, share your journey, know from our experts and explore more about behaviour and how you can help them!
Team ParentCircleSep 21, 2020
@Anonymous That’s a conundrum. So obviously setting up a reward didn’t work in changing her behaviour. Two things u need to think about - 1. Why is she not able to do the self-care tasks independently? Are you expecting too much of her? Has she been set up to believe that it is something you'll always help her with? or some other reason? and 2. if you do bring the pup home, will u task her with helping with the pup? and what happens when she doesn’t? you'll end up doing it yourself? Let's discuss these points. You have said, the expectations relating to taking care of the pup are mutually discussed and clearly defined; much before you brought home the pup. You have therefore set clear expectations from your daughter and so, we can expect her to help you with the responsibilities. Now, coming to the brushing bit - if everything was done for her, and you want to change that now, the last thing that'll work is telling her to do it herself. You'll have to do hand-holding for the parts she's totally unable to do right now while giving her an opportunity to do the parts she willingly does Break down the morning routine into say 5 steps. For each step, think about what she is able to do herself and how much time it requires. Then for each part she is able to do herself, you'll have to stand at a distance and egg her on without nagging her- this requires time and patience but if you want her to be independent, you'll have to go through this even if she takes time If you break it down to 5 steps, initially you don’t have to get her to do all 5 herself. Maybe get her the brush and tell her to brush, while telling a story. The story pauses if she pauses. No shouting, no nagging. You probably will get the brushing done in 10! You need to be patient and give her the message that you're there for her, but you won’t do everything for her. P.S – Start with a premise that you can tell only one or two stories based on your child’s speed at which she can brush and agree on that beforehand. Stay strong and Parent on!Reply