Emotional resilience helps us deal with stress and adversity. But, how would you know that you’re raising a resilient child? Read on to know the seven signs you should look for.
By Ramu Anil
"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts" — Winston Churchill
Almost every day, we come across stories of individuals who struggled against adversity, did not give in, and emerged victorious. Awestruck by their steely resolve, we try to decode what made them accomplish the feat. And, we find that they owe their success largely to a quality called Resilience.
In simple terms, resilience can be defined as the ability to never give up and recover from any setback. Therefore, it is important for parents to develop resilience in children. But, to do that, parents need to know the signs of resilience in a child. Here are eight signs of a resilient child.
1. Develops healthy relationships: Establishing and maintaining healthy relationships goes a long way in creating a social framework which is protective and supportive. This is important to lead a happy and healthy life. Resilient children know how to develop enduring relationships.
What you should do: Teach your child how to bond and interact in a better way with family members, friends, teachers and others. This will help him develop a caring and comforting network which he can fall back upon during times of distress.
2. Is self-aware: Being self-aware helps a child have a clear idea of her strengths and weaknesses, and beliefs and thoughts. This helps her perceive things around her in different ways. It also improves her problem-solving skills and helps her come up with better solutions.
What you should do: Teach your child to explore her strengths and weaknesses. Let her try to find solutions to problems on her own. Encourage her to follow her passion. And, make sure you build her self-esteem.
3. Displays self-control: The ability to manage emotions or exercising self-control helps a child stick to the task he is doing despite encountering distractions and adversities. A resilient child is able to manage his feelings and deal with frustrations, which helps him focus and achieve his goals.
What you should do: Help your child develop the ability to control his impulses and emotions. Encourage him to take part in activities that develop self-discipline. Playing with other children can go a long way in teaching your child how to keep his emotions under control.
4. Takes the initiative: A resilient child has a higher level of perception and can analyse a situation from different angles. This gives her a proactive mindset and the ability to take charge during difficult times. She is also more practical in her enquiry and evaluation.
What you should do: Motivate your child to not rely on someone else to solve her problems. Instead, she should take the lead. Encourage your child to ask questions. Develop her talents and problem-solving ability.
5. Accepts failures gracefully: Being resilient helps a child view failure as a stepping stone to success. This helps him accept his failures gracefully, keep a positive attitude, learn from his mistakes and not repeat them, and strive to gain success.
What you should do: Praise your child’s efforts and his positive attitude, even when he doesn’t succeed. Reinforce to him that failure is also a part of the learning process. Discuss with him what went wrong and encourage him to finetune his strategy and try again. Also, teach your child to manage his expectations and keep them realistic.
6. Has a sense of humour: A little bit of humour goes a long way in helping us deal with disappointments and keeping our morale high. A resilient child displays a sense of humour which makes her more likeable and popular. Humour also provides the child with a more socially acceptable way of expressing difficult feelings like frustration and anger.
What you should do: Imagination plays a big role in helping a child look at things in a different way. So, encourage your child to imagine something funny. You can also crack jokes and watch funny movies to help develop her sense of humour.
7. Has a growth mindset: A resilient child has a growth mindset. Therefore, he is willing to learn new skills, improve his abilities, and take advantage of opportunities that come his way. This helps him grow in not only his personal life but also succeed in academics and his professional life.
What you should do: Find out opportunities to help your child develop his abilities. Make him understand that his abilities and talents are not fixed and that he can work on them and get better with time.
Teaching a child to be persistent yet flexible can be difficult. But, with patience and time, you can help your child become resilient. Follow your instinct and our tips, and you will find that you can mould your child into an individual who is capable of taking on every challenge that life throws at him.
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