Your child tries to manipulate you, does not share, displays an attitude, throws tantrums, is disrespectful — chances are you're spoiling your child. Here are five signs to watch out for.
By Team ParentCircle
The term 'spoilt child' brings to mind the image of a child sprawled on the floor of a toy shop and wailing for his favourite toy. Or a child who sulks and is angry with his friends because they do not want to play the game his way!
But, why do some children behave in such a manner?
An increasingly busy lifestyle is preventing many parents from spending time with their children and taking care of them. This fills parents with a sense of remorse and guilt. In their eagerness to compensate for their inability to be there for their children, some busy parents tend to go overboard. They shower their children with gifts and fulfil their every demand. Some even go to the extent of ignoring or indulging their child's bad behaviour. All this can contribute to making the child demanding, disrespectful and disinclined to follow rules.
However, a child behaving in an unacceptable manner occasionally isn't always a spoilt brat. So, how will you know if you are unwittingly spoiling your child? Here are five unmistakable signs to watch out for.
1. Persists with demands: Every time your child wants something, he persists with his demand until you give in. Bowing to your child's pressure tactics has made him understand that you will eventually agree to what he wants. This is one of the surest signs of a spoilt child.
2. Doesn't share: While your child doesn't think twice before accepting anything from others, she is unwilling to share her possessions. And, instead of correcting your child's behaviour, you prefer to ignore this tendency just because you don't want to make her unhappy.
3. Is never satisfied: Even though you try to give your child whatever he wants, he is never satisfied with what he has. And, as he is sure that you won't refuse, he often comes to you with demands like, 'I want my brother's toy car as well' or 'Give me another cup of ice cream'.
4. Disregards rules and authority: Since your child has got into the habit of taking charge, she doesn't want to follow rules or directives. She is defiant and has scant respect for you or what you say because she knows that you will never correct her disobedience. Left unchecked, with time, she can become even more non-compliant. This can adversely affect her as an adult.
5. Is Ungrateful: As you always provide your child with everything without making her work for it, she is filled with a sense of entitlement. She accepts everything without saying thanks or expressing appreciation. And, if something is not to her liking, she has no reservations about turning it down or criticising it.
Sometimes, as parents, we do not realise that we spoil our children by giving them too many things. Remember that parental attitudes contribute to a child's value system. So, it is important to reflect on how parenting can affect a child. While we want to give our children the best of everything, we also need to understand where to draw the line.
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Aparna Samuel Balasundaram
"The key values I learnt from my parents are patience, hard work, sincerity, honesty, discipline ...